A short story by Sunita Soliar

Although the appointment would only last an hour or so in the afternoon, Evelyn had taken the whole day off. The sneakiness of it all exhausted her. On Great Titchfield Street she squinted at the sky: winter had been buffed bright and she could see through to the yellow promise of daffodils. She turned quickly into Bellaโs bridal shop โ they had planned it before and so she would do it. She liked the comfort of plans and routines, controllable and unextraordinary: they made these days hers, and not anyone elseโs.
She moved furtively towards a rack โ looking was alright. The laces and silks glimmered with delights to come: shared bathroom shelves, children. Lately, children seemed to be everywhere โ through the windows of buses, on park benches. At least she and Peter had had the shelves. Silly not to have married a few years ago: she hadnโt spoilt anything then. Reaching for a satin sleeve, she felt it tug sharply away, and a voice leapt through her.
โTouchingโs going too far.โ
โYou ought to wear a bell!โ Evelyn said. โIโm sorry, it didnโt say not to touchโฆโ
The stranger was blonde, slightly younger than Evelyn โ early thirties, maybe โ and the whites of her eyes had a blinding vitality, the blue irises jabbed into them like needles.
Evelyn drew herself up: โI had it first.โ
โIt makes no difference.โ
โLet go.โ
โYou let go.โ The stranger seemed to look straight through her. Then her mouth exploded with sudden laughter. โItโs not really my taste,โ she said.
The dress slackened and Evelyn gathered it against her as though catching a breath until she was sure the woman had gone.
She placed it on the sales desk. โIโll take it.โ
The assistant frowned. โDonโt you want to try it on?โ
โNo. I thought that lady was going to fight me for it.โ
The assistant put it in a suit carrier. โBecause we donโt do refunds.โ She pointed to a sign. โSee?โ
Outside Evelyn made sure that she had her purse. She liked to double check things, like locking the front door. She had forty weary minutes before she needed to get on the tube at Goodge Street so she sat in Costa with coffee and a slice of walnut cake.
โYou shouldnโt have done it.โ
Evelynโs cup clattered onto the saucer and she looked up into blue, puncturing eyes. โAre you following me?โ
The stranger sat down and toyed with a flower on the table. โSo pretty,โ she said, and snapped off a petal.
Evelyn pressed her fingers white. โAll the same, Iโd like to eat alone.โ
โWhenโs the wedding?โ
โNext spring.โ
The stranger dealt the brunt of her eyes, forcing Evelyn to say, โWe planned for spring.โ
โThe thing is though โ do you mind?โ She spooned Evelynโs cake.
โYouโre trying to cheat. You know something he doesnโt.โ
Evelynโs appetite slipped down her throat. โHow do you know about us?โ
The woman gave her hideously bright laugh. โIt wonโt do: secret meetings yet still letting him hang onto the weddingโฆโ
โYou want to hurt us.โ
โLetโs not reach after fantasies. Iโd say you didnโt like me.โ She scooped up the cake with jolly menace.
The room sweated around Evelyn, and she dabbed a napkin against her forehead. She was not well. She wanted water, assistance. Surely someone could see what this woman was doing to her? But what would they see? Where was the harm in having coffee?
She said, โI need time.โ
The stranger flattened crumbs with her finger. The cake was all gone. โYou have to go,โ she said. โYour appointment.โ
When Evelyn arrived home she put the dress and the Meadowvale information pack on the kitchen table. It wasnโt a bad place, she supposed, for that type of place. It would only be six months, that was a way to think about it. She opened a cupboard and pushed Meadowvale under a packet of shortbread.
Those little nuances of the dark that transform coats into night terrors told her someone was in the living room. She went in and fumbled for the lamp switch.
The stranger sat cross-legged in an armchair. A cigarette wisped from her hand.
โHow did you get in here?โ
โYou let me in.โ
โIโฆ?โ Evelyn looked over her shoulder in the vague direction of the front door. She remembered closing it.
Ash fell from the cigarette onto a side table. Evelyn noticed burn marks on the wood.
โWe donโt smoke,โ she said. โPeter wonโt like it.โ
โIโll have to quit.โ
The room was altered. A photograph was missing. The T.V. was not where it used to be.
Evelyn said, โHe has me. Why would he want you?โ
โI might wonder that too.โ The stranger stubbed the cigarette onto the table and came towards her. โLook, youโll never see me again โ thatโs my end of the bargain. And yoursโฆโ Her eyes danced over Evelynโs necklace. โI like that.โ
โIt was a present from Peter.โ
โGive it to me.โ
โNo.โ
The woman snatched at her, and Evelyn drew her arms over her face.
She was screaming when Peter came in.
โEvelyn, good Lord!โ He shook her into focus.
She pointed. โHer! Get her away from me!โ
โWho, Evelyn? Get who away?โ
The cigarette was no longer there and the burns had disappeared. The photograph was back.
Peter chuckled. โWhatโs rattled you, eh?โ Loosening his tie he went into the kitchen and laid the table. โNew dress?โ
โItโs nothing.โ A maximum of six months was what the oncologist had said. Sheโd only known for a few weeks. They couldnโt even give her next spring.
โWater?โ Peter called. โThe new lawyer arrived today. Sheโs a filthy habit of smoking though. I canโt imagine dating a smoker.โ
โWhatโs her name?โ
โGillian. You alright?โ He smiled, and it made her think of long walks on the beachโฆall the moments she didnโt want to give up. Peter was perfect, too good for her, really. And she was always the one ruining it. Theyโd gone on a picnic once. Heโd prepared the wine, the foodโฆall sheโd had to make was the potato salad and she hadnโt boiled the potatoes properly. Yet Peter stood in their kitchen. She followed him in, feeling again as though it all belonged to her: her dishcloths with the embroidered pumpkins, their shared meals. Her hand reached up to the knob of the biscuit cupboard: enduring this would cement their life together.
โPeter, can we talk for a minute. Iโฆโ Her collarbone prickled with the sudden realisation of bareness. Her fingers clutched at where her necklace had been. โShe has blue eyes,โ she blurted.
Peter sliced a tomato. โWho?โ
โGillian, obviously.โ
โI have no โโ
โDoesnโt she?โ
โI suppose she might have, yes. Darling, whatโs the matter?โ
And the living room crept up on her. โIโll just move the armchair,โ she said, her voice sifting away. โItโs out of place.โ
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